Emotions

My pain
My hurt
My ache
My sting
My agony
My feeling
This is my existence
My hate
My dislike
My objection
My aversion
My distaste
My disgust
This too is my existence

My anger
My ire
My wrath
My fury
My fume
My rage
This is my existence
My sadness
My sorrow
My grief
My gloom
My misery
My distress
This too is my existence

My thrill
My joy
My happiness
My delight
My pleasure
My ecstasy
This is my existence
My love
My ardor
My affection
My passion
My fervor
My craze
This too is my existence

Emotions
I laugh and I smile
I cry and I frown
My emotions to express
Part of me they are
But me they don’t make
This is my true existence

I Wish

I wish I could play the guitar

Like Bebo Norman

The bass guitar

Like Abe Laboriel

I wish I could play the sax

Like Kenny G

Woodwinds

Like Justo Almario

I wish I could churn out movies

Like Steven Spielberg

Drama series

Like David Kelley

Or reality shows

Like Mark Burnett

I wish I could write more often

Write you more often

Call you more often

I wish I could wish you a happy birthday

On your birth day

Good morning

In the morning

Good night

At night

I wish these wishes were horses

Then I would trot away into the sunset

In a golden chariot

With gallant and majestic outriders

Just to wish you

All that you wish

Vicissitudes

In view of the happenings of the past weekend, talking of sports of course. I have felt rather downcast . first it was the narrow loss to Uganda in the Elgon cup, and at home to boot. At the Mecca of Kenyan rugby, nothing can be more distressing than that. Then came the series whitewash of the cricketing lads at the hands of plucky Bangladesh. A team we used to dismiss offhandedly just like that, still at home. At the Nairobi Gymkhana, the Mecca of Kenyan cricket….blaaaah! This dude has a bad taste in the mouth. Am eating humble pie! Kwani why else would I have a bad taste in the mouth.

So much for the rant. If you are a chic pliz stop reading as u can see this is a very manly post.

I got this quote from the movie “V for Vendetta” and we thought the fresh Freddy one liners were hilarious (if not dumb). Boys out there I think this would knock out any sane “Out of my face…..i heard this before” chic, unless of course she has watched the movie or read this post.

"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V." -- V's introduction to Evey

Hmm if u r a chic and are still reading this just goes ahead to prove the facts that chics don’t listen

Well have yourselves a very vivacious day.

Am back again

Its been a while , a long while since I posted anything on this blog. And it feels real good to be up and writing again. This has been the most acute bout of any block (bloggers, writers….whatever) I have ever had. It took a lot of cajoling from one of my buddies and a lot of will power to be able to even come up with this post. So here is to keeping promises and to fulfilling pledges. I don’t know the difference between them.

Coming of age

I just commemorated my birthday last Sunday. No bash, no speeches and infact just a few friends knew about it. All I got was a cute watch and a lot of wishes and hugs. Thanks all of you for all the love I received. You all made my day.

L’amite

This is a tribute to friendship. One gift that has kept me going for the past I don’t know how long. I owe it to my friends for who I am right now. Its because of their love to me, their censures and support that I am. I thank you all for putting up with all my innuendos, my silly stunts and plain stupidity at times. It is said that good friends are like stars: you don’t always see them but you know that they are there. Thank you all my dear buddies, my boys and gals. Nyinyi wote nasema ahsante. This is one quote I got that sums up all that you have been to me:

A friend is one
To whom one may pour out all
The contents of one's heart
Chaff and grain, together,
Knowing that the gentlest of hands
Will take and sift it,
Keep what's worth keeping
And blow the rest away.

Dinah Mulock

Wish you a weekend full of friendship

HAPPINESS

I want it, I need it
My happiness
This feeling so strong
This longing
This urge in my soul
They took it away
They yanked it from me
They wrenched it from my grasp
They wrung it
They squeezed it
They squished it
Of its very essence
They milked it dry
It’s all shriveled up

Bang! Bang! Bang!
Hear them shoot
Hot lead tearing into me
To my very heart
Through my very heart
Out my very heart
Kamikaze they said
My death is their gain
My last breath
My pain
My bloodstain
Their hands stained
My heart pained
I want it, I need it
My happiness, my joy
Must have it, must get it
This feeling so strong

SOMETIMES

Sometimes things are as they look
Sometimes

Sometimes it rains
Sometimes it shines
Sometimes its just overcast
The sun shyly peeping out of the cloudy curtain
Or maybe just too weak to push them away
Sometimes its dark and stormy
And windy and rough
Sometimes its calm and cool
And serene
Sometimes

Sometimes its warm and sunny
Sometimes its cold and rainy
Sometimes its hot and dusty
Sometimes

Sometimes is not Anytime
Sometimes is not Everytime
Sometimes is not Notime
Sometimes is
Well
Sometimes

Hawk-a-Share

Been suffering from bloggers block, precisely coz there was so much to write about, so much so that my mind went blank whenever i settled down to write something. Guess that confirms my "wannabeness" in the area of writing. But its good to be writing again, now where do I start.

Great sports weekend
Last weekend was great for ManU and Kenyan rugby fans. ManU wallops Arsenal and for once the old rivalry (some would call it hooliganism) was replayed in many a sports bars. THe game was beautiful, without the usual tension that accompanies such games.
The Kenyan sevens rugby team bags the bowl trophy in the Singapore sevens tournament and with it two more points on the overall standings. Some of the big scalps our boys bagged were Samoa and Scotland. England denied us a place in the quatres of the main cup by failing to beat Samoa, man sometimes life can be so unfair. Good performance all the same.

Shares Galore
The Kengen IPO generated a lot of euphoria culminating in a rush for the shares by many ordinary Kenyans. Did I say ordinary??? Well here is a story of one extraordinary Kenyan investor................a street boy. It is said the guy applied for shares worth Sh.40,000. Yeah, 40K worth and in coins, talk of smart savers and shrewd investors.
With so many Kenyans so hungry to invest on the stock market, soon we might see the "jua kalinization" of the stock market. In other words I wouldnt be surprise if in a few years we would have people hawking shares in River road. You know........that sing song "Kumi, kumi...KQ ni kumi hata Kengen ni kumi" and in another corner, "Kila kitu ni mia, mia mia kilakitu ni mia...Barclays ni mia,Sasini ni mia yote ni mia". All of a sudden there is a flurry and commotion as the hawkers gather their shares in those purple clothes as they scramble to the safety of the infamous street's alleys ,with the Capital Markets Authority (CMA) and City council askaris in hot pursuit. Men! Dont we just love Kenyan enterprise, the good thing is that mtumba shares are just as good as new shares, so I dont forsee exhibitions selling shares being set up.
I will set up a wholesale shop for shares in some nook (sakati) behind Luthuli avenue probably call it "Blueswift share hawkers galore" just to position myself strategically. You know the mobile phone accessories boom passed me, and I dont want this to pass me also. Anyone wants to hawk shares....talk to me.

Hear me out
Finally, have you ever heard a conversation and hoped that your mother didnt hear the same about you. Well, here is an exerpt from a real conversation a friend of mine was involved in, names have been changed to protect the identity of the culprits:

Kurt: Have you seen Stacy of late?
Bart: Oh, Stacy. I usually meet her on Koinange street in the evenings.
Kurt: Ati?

Well, I leave you to imagine how the conversation ended. Have a fab day.

***********************
My heart goes out to the families of the people who lost their lives in the marsabit tragedy. To those who lost their fathers, sons, brothers, uncles, couzins, friends. May God give you strength to pass through this trying moment.
To the people of Kenya for losing our leaders, let us honour them by promoting peace.

Of Zeronski and Success

If A equals success, then the formula is A = X + Y + Z. X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut. -- Albert Einstein

No wonder I blog, chat online and contribute to a few online forums. I wanna make the formula complete, if only I could get the X correct. Guess it aint the same for Kenyan politicians and radio presenters. Do those guys ever shut their mouths? Anyway who is Einstein to define to us what success is? Isn’t he the same guy who came up with the relativity stuff? Hmmm methinks it’s just an excuse to be able to shift the goal whenever the likes of I fika there, successtopia. BTW how many people would consider me successful…..well, would I of all people? Nah nah nah, I mean that would be the day! And yeah success is relative. You can’t dump relatives, and you can quote me on that.

We buried one last week, an uncle, my mother’s brother, father to my cousins, a second father to me. A successful man he was, knew when to work, play and also when to keep his mouth shut (BTW he was one of the loudest dudes you ever saw). I will surely miss the guy, we all will. Generous to a fault, at least to me he was. Zeronski this is to you.

Zeronski’s sendoff wasn’t without its share of drama . Being a tough son of the soil, of course he had to be sent off with all the fanfare and deference that befits his stature. Everyone wanted a piece of him, and anyway wasn’t he their guy. The hearse’s siren was drowned by the cacophony caused by the wailing, whistles and horns (not car horns, natural ones). But the highlight of it all was this guy with a recorder (I always called it a flute), not because of his prowess in playing it, but rather for the opposite. Obviously charged with some hard stuff-the hardest and maybe reinforced by some hard smoke, the guy went on bragging how he played the instrument even in Europe. Challenging us even to ask Zeronski….duh! then he would burst forth in his rendition of Zeronski’s symphony in K minor- ever heard the noise a mbuzi makes when kicking its last……

All this just to bid you bye. Of course you couldnt see it all, you were lying smug in your pretty white casket. Well, Zeronski if you were reading this, then I would wish you a nice rest from the vagaries of this world. The cacophony, the chaos, miasma. The hypocrisy, double talk, name it. You lived your life well. Am just reminded of these sayings from…..you guessed well, Albert Einstein:

"The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead."

And that:

“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile”

May we all follow Zeronski’s nyayos.

Au retour

Okay am still the wannabe writer of yore. Do I ever learn, naaah, not that am aware of it. Guess I just have to do with spewing forth these amateurish words in a bid to sound just a wee bit writer-ish. Eeeesh!! That was so ish ish. Well I just had a nice long hiatus from writing, what do you expect. I just told a buddy of mine that I ran out of stories; probably. But honestly speaking, guess there has been too much going on in my mind that whenever I wanna settle down and comment on some occurrence, it is surpassed by the events. If I were a journalist, I would have been scooped like a million times thank God am not one.

First things first. Thanks to the few fans I have, those who think that my raves and rants are hilarious. Well if I hadn’t told you, I have a sense of humor, in that I can sense it when it is delivered, as for delivering it, well……God knows best. Poi, mama shady, may you die of laughter and may you never ever resurrect from it. To J.R Woodward, may you live in interesting times. Lastly but not least “anonymous” my ever loyal reader….i know you and there is simply no reason to hide your identity, you give me a reason to continue doing this. And to those of you who didn’t drop a line to me, may you always have time to drop me a line. This is a tribute to you guys for making me feel so bloated up and well….appreciated.

Well, here I go again, bloggers block…is there anything like that? This is where I display my other trait, being a man of few words (of my own if at all), I mean only a few make sense. Yada yada yada and I wonder how people actually read these things. Been a mild movie freak, as in I catch a movie every once in a while and quite a few have left a mark on my psyche. Lemme just finish this post by quoting an excerpt of William Parish (acted by Antony Hopkins of “Silence of the Lambs” fame) to Joe black (Brad Pitt). So if you are still wondering what am yodeling on about:

William Parrish: Multiply it by infinity, and take it to the depth of forever, and you will still have barely a glimpse of what I'm talking about.
Joe Black: Those were my words.
William Parrish: They're mine now.

Hasta luego mis amigos. God bless you all.

BOOTCAMP: We lick your boots
This has nothing to do with the military or any other such institution that is associated with bootcamps. Am not going to talk about elaborate military drills or the shouting of orders or any other such things, but hey just hear me out a little. It is said that imitation is the best form of flattery (or is it compliment). Why am I even talking about imitation in the first place? This is because as a wannabe writer, I don’t have a style of my own, language of my own dammit even the ideas I pen down are not my own but a plethora of thoughts from such renown scribes as Oyunga Pala and Clay Muganda, not to mention a myriad of individuals I consider my close buddies. Well, if there is anything as a copy cat, then am guilty as charged. Mea culpa mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. This reminds me of one common Kenyan trait-aping. Man! We are such copycats! Sellah….
We speak English in fake accents acquired after watching a few movies at the neighbours house. We squeeze into our baby sister's clothes so as to look a little bit like Halle Berry, in the process spilling out unsightly pot bellies and exposing cellulite infested thighs for the world to see. We churn out our own copycat versions of "Jay Z" and brand them as "celebs",our movies are fake….man! , The list is endless…..Is it any wonder that we have no cultural identity that is uniquely Kenyan. Are we maasai (ostensibly the cultural face of Kenya),africans or "Kenyan African Americans"???Hmmmm.
Well, so much for that. I guess, when it comes to imitation, I think we are high up the scale. In our case it ceases to be flattery. It is plain boot licking. Hey, welcome to the bootcamp. Here we lick the boots. We lick them clean. So for all of you nonKenyans, next time you are travelling to Kenya, don’t forget to carry your boots

ALCOBLOWS: The art of Toasting

I have always been fascinated by people who take alcoholic drinks. Well, the drunkards in this category, are often a spectacle and this could either be entertaining or plain obnoxious depending on the individual. However, what I like most about imbibers of all drinks alcoholic is the toasts they make. This is a compelling reason for me not to go ahead and advocate strongly for the banning of all drinks alcoholic much the same way that hard drugs are. It goes more than saying cheers or a votre sante or salude or l'chayim. Its an artform. On second thoughts I think people came up with toasts so as to play down the usual bitter taste that many alcoholic drinks have. Anyway here are a few toasts I came across, so next time you are poping that bottle of bubbly, you have no excuse whatsoever but to propose a toast.

May friendship, like wine, improve as time advances,
And may we always have old wine, old friends, and young cares.

To my friends:
Friends we are today,
And friends we'll always be —
For I am wise to you,
And you can see through me

May bad fortune follow you all your days
And never catch up with you.

To get the full value of joy,
you must have someone to divide it with.
— Mark Twain

I drink to your charm,
your beauty and your brains —
Which gives you a rough idea of how hard up I am
for a drink.
— Groucho Marx

Don't make love by the garden gate -
Love is blind - but the neighbors ain't !

Here's to you, as good as you are and as bad as I am,
I'm as good as you are, as bad as I am

May the people who dance on your grave get cramps in their legs.
from the book, The Joys of Yiddish

However, the one that captured me most was this by Alex Hitchens (Will Smith) in the movie Hitch:

Here is to never cheating, stealing or drinking.
If you must cheat - cheat death
If you must steal - steal away from bad company
If you must drink - drink in the moments that take your breath away

Have a breath taking day!!!

OUTTA THE BLUES TO THE MOUNTAINS HIGH

Once upon a time when I was younger (am young as it is), I got the opportunity to climb the highest mountain in Western Kenya, Mt Elgon. Now this is a moment I really cherish to this day. Mountains have a character of their own, right from the vegetation to the climate found at their different altitudes irrespective of the surrounding environment/area.

Mountains command respect. Before one climbs a mountain he/she has to get acclimatized to the mountain situation. One has to get used to the thin air especially in the higher altitudes; this in addition to the biting cold and the strenuous journey one has to undertake to conquer the alp. Well, am not really a mountain expert, but my experience on the mountain taught me a few lessons which I cherish to this day

One thing is that one should never be assumptive (sic). Never assume nor overlook anything. Be prepared in everything you do. Never underestimate any situation or person or whatever it is you may be facing. It is prudent to be well prepared for all eventualities, but neither should we overestimate anything. But aren't we human? Many a times we go about life guarding ourselves and covering ourselves in silky cocoons afraid of exposing ourselves. In a mountain situation this would involve packing just about everything in the rucksack. Extra pairs of gloves, an extra blanket to supplement to supplement the huge well, lined sleeping bag, extra rations, an extra first aid kit, well practically a micro-hospital. The result is that we weigh ourselves down with unnecessary luggage. Is. it any wonder that we more often than not get slowed down and tire quite easily. Do we need this extra luggage in life?

On the other hand, underestimating the challenge that the mountain portends is practically suicidal. You don’t wanna run out of supplies mid way through a climb, especially one that could take several days all in the name of travelling light. You simply need to be prepared to deal with each and every foreseeable eventuality. An extra jacket would be very welcome during that unexpected storm up the mountain. In extreme cases, underestimating the alpine challenge is simply put, deadly lethal.

Secondly during the hike, one needs to pace themselves at a pace that one can handle. Not too fast as to wear yourself out quickly and not too slow as to drag the expedition unnecessarily.
However to be dreaded most is altitude sickness, could be compared to seasickness but in my opinion more sickening. Usually brought about by the sudden altitude change and atmospheric pressure. A mountain climbers nightmare that.

But the greatest lesson that I brought with me was this. Enjoy! Enjoy the fresh mountain air. Pause and take one deep breathe and exhale slowly. Savor the moment. Enjoy the company of good friends, the friendly banter and the camaraderie. Enjoy the different mountain vistas, the variety of flora and even fauna one meets along the way. Live the moment and let it take the breath out of you. The greatest joy however is reaching the summit. It is a top of the world experience. Your head could literally be in the clouds. The sense of conquering and achievement is simply heavenly.

In this world are many mountains, majestic and immovable. The many troubles we face and the everyday challenges. We must climb these mountains, conquer those peaks and vanquish those enemies.